Saturday, April 10, 2010
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Meeting With Our New Doctor
Today we were able to meet with the specialist out in Shawnee (Dr. Murphy) whom we will be seeing for the duration of the pregnancy. He was extremely kind and supportive, which I am very thankful for. Today's appointment basically just consisted of us talking about what Keith and I know about Trisomy 13, as well as the frequency of upcoming appointments, etc. There were some questions that I had that unfortunately can't yet be answered until further down the line, when we know a little bit more about Ethan's condition. We will be seeing this doctor on a monthly basis for now, in addition to monthly ultrasound appointments with the perinatologist. We're going to plan on staggering the appoinments so that we're either going to one place or the other every 2 weeks. That way I can have frequent checkups and, hopefully, reassurance that things are okay.
Overall I felt like today's appointment went really well, but then again any appointment that doesn't involve needles or blood is always good to me! It's reassuring to know that we have a doctor who seems to really care about us. In fact, he gave me his pager # and told me I could contact him any time I have questions or concerns. That helps to put my mind at ease a bit.
Other than that, there's really no other news to report. I'm still continually praying that Ethan will continue to grow and that he will get stronger. I thank God every day for this pregnancy because I already feel like it is already making me a better person. As always, thanks for your support and prayers- they have no doubt also contributed to that!
Love,
Ashley
Overall I felt like today's appointment went really well, but then again any appointment that doesn't involve needles or blood is always good to me! It's reassuring to know that we have a doctor who seems to really care about us. In fact, he gave me his pager # and told me I could contact him any time I have questions or concerns. That helps to put my mind at ease a bit.
Other than that, there's really no other news to report. I'm still continually praying that Ethan will continue to grow and that he will get stronger. I thank God every day for this pregnancy because I already feel like it is already making me a better person. As always, thanks for your support and prayers- they have no doubt also contributed to that!
Love,
Ashley
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Better Start Buying Lottery Tickets...
Today we were able to view the final results of the chromosones from the amnio. The good news is that it is the fluke, 1 in 100,000 occurrence and not genetically linked. So (assuming/praying lightning won't strike twice) we have an extremely slim chance of this happening in a future pregnancy. We were pretty relieved to hear this. Although I must admit that going through this experience, I may never feel 100% confident in future pregnancies no matter what the odds are.
We also found out that this is a full Trisomy 13, which means that all of Ethan's cells are affected by the third chromosone. There are three types of Trisomy 13, and this is considered the most severe. As I've said before, we don't yet know the full extent of the anomalies that our baby has besides the abdominal wall defect and enlarged kidneys. We have another level 2 ultrasound scheduled for next Thursday, which will hopefully get a better look at the heart and brain to look for any abnormalities. I am still praying that the heart is okay. I'm also praying that the brain might be only slightly affected, but I'm not going to kid myself and believe that it won't be affected at all. I know that this is almost never (if at all) the case with Trisomy 13.
I feel a little more relieved after today's appoinment, and hopefully I'll remain that way as we go into tomorrow's. I already know that the sick feeling will most likely return as I go to the ultrasound next week, but I'm trying to focus on each day as it comes. A mom who recently e-mailed me gave me a quote that her daughter lived by as she went through a similar experience:
"Don't go borrowing tomorrow's sorrows"
This is what I intend to do. I will appreciate each day as it comes, and not waste my time worrying about what's going to happen tomorrow, a week from now, or next year. Of course, this is easier said than done. But I'm going to do my best not to give in to the worries that try to take over my mind.
I'll be sure to blog after tomorrow's appointment and let you know how it goes. Thanks for all of your continued support. You have all been in my prayers as well!
Love,
Ashley
We also found out that this is a full Trisomy 13, which means that all of Ethan's cells are affected by the third chromosone. There are three types of Trisomy 13, and this is considered the most severe. As I've said before, we don't yet know the full extent of the anomalies that our baby has besides the abdominal wall defect and enlarged kidneys. We have another level 2 ultrasound scheduled for next Thursday, which will hopefully get a better look at the heart and brain to look for any abnormalities. I am still praying that the heart is okay. I'm also praying that the brain might be only slightly affected, but I'm not going to kid myself and believe that it won't be affected at all. I know that this is almost never (if at all) the case with Trisomy 13.
I feel a little more relieved after today's appoinment, and hopefully I'll remain that way as we go into tomorrow's. I already know that the sick feeling will most likely return as I go to the ultrasound next week, but I'm trying to focus on each day as it comes. A mom who recently e-mailed me gave me a quote that her daughter lived by as she went through a similar experience:
"Don't go borrowing tomorrow's sorrows"
This is what I intend to do. I will appreciate each day as it comes, and not waste my time worrying about what's going to happen tomorrow, a week from now, or next year. Of course, this is easier said than done. But I'm going to do my best not to give in to the worries that try to take over my mind.
I'll be sure to blog after tomorrow's appointment and let you know how it goes. Thanks for all of your continued support. You have all been in my prayers as well!
Love,
Ashley
Appointment Today
Today Keith and I have an appointment to meet with the perinatologist who did my amnio. We should be finding out the final results of the chromosones, and I'm not sure what else we might go over with her. I have to admit that there's a little bit of anxiety creeping up on me again. I guess because we've received bad news each time we've gone to that facility, I now associate it with awful feelings. But I suppose all I can do is surrender these feelings to God and hope that he can fill me with some sort of sense of calmness.
Tomorrow is our appointment with our new specialist, and I'm also kind of nervous about that. I really hope that he's a supportive, sympathetic doctor who will help us through the rest of this pregnancy and beyond. I'm not sure what the visit will entail besides discussing future appointments and possibly delivery. I will be sure to post updates after both of these appointments.
Thanks for you continued support, and please join us in praying that God will help us feel brave and calm no matter what comes our way.
Love,
Ashley
Tomorrow is our appointment with our new specialist, and I'm also kind of nervous about that. I really hope that he's a supportive, sympathetic doctor who will help us through the rest of this pregnancy and beyond. I'm not sure what the visit will entail besides discussing future appointments and possibly delivery. I will be sure to post updates after both of these appointments.
Thanks for you continued support, and please join us in praying that God will help us feel brave and calm no matter what comes our way.
Love,
Ashley
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Happy Easter
We are now back home after a quick trip to Omaha this weekend to see family. Last night we celebrated Easter with Keith's family, and this morning we did the same with mine. It was nice to see everyone, including our niece and new little nephew. It's fun to have little ones around when you celebrate holidays. We couldn't have asked for any better weather for this visit. This is the first year I can remember in awhile that it's actually felt like spring on Easter! The last few years it seems like it's been unseasonably cool. I love it when I can actually wear a spring dress and be comfortable!
This evening we're just relaxing and trying to enjoy the last bit of the weekend. We took the doggies on a little walk, and now are going to cozy up on the couch to watch some television. A nice way to end the night!
As I'm writing this, I'm thinking about what our priest talked about at Mass today regarding the meaning of Easter. Easter is all about hope and new life. Moving from sorrow to joy. The death of Jesus represents sadness and despair, but his ressurection gives us hope and fills us with peace. In a way, I feel like the story of Easter applies to our story as well. We have gone through initial feelings of grief and hopelessness, but as we made our decision to continue this journey, we felt a sense of peace and happiness. I know our story is just beginning, and certainly this may not be the last time we feel pain or sorrow. But for today I'm choosing to focus on the celebration of Easter- of joy, happiness, and life. I hope that you and your family were able to enjoy this holiday together, and may you also be feeling a sense of peace and happiness.
Love,
Ashley
This evening we're just relaxing and trying to enjoy the last bit of the weekend. We took the doggies on a little walk, and now are going to cozy up on the couch to watch some television. A nice way to end the night!
As I'm writing this, I'm thinking about what our priest talked about at Mass today regarding the meaning of Easter. Easter is all about hope and new life. Moving from sorrow to joy. The death of Jesus represents sadness and despair, but his ressurection gives us hope and fills us with peace. In a way, I feel like the story of Easter applies to our story as well. We have gone through initial feelings of grief and hopelessness, but as we made our decision to continue this journey, we felt a sense of peace and happiness. I know our story is just beginning, and certainly this may not be the last time we feel pain or sorrow. But for today I'm choosing to focus on the celebration of Easter- of joy, happiness, and life. I hope that you and your family were able to enjoy this holiday together, and may you also be feeling a sense of peace and happiness.
Love,
Ashley
Friday, April 2, 2010
A GOOD Friday
Today has been a really good day for several reasons. First of all, I started my new job at AAA. While I am still a "newbie" and haven't yet been trained in all facets of my role, I was able to jump in and help a lot since I have prior experience. Everyone at the office seems really nice, and they were very welcoming to me. As a bonus, I was lucky enough to start on a day that they were doing an office cookout! They had lots of yummy food for lunch, and one of the insurance agents even grilled some burgers and hotdogs! However, since it is Lent, I did have to forgo those and make a cheese sandwich instead. I still enjoyed it though! All in all my first day went really well, and I look forward to receiving more training and taking on more responsiblities.
Today was also a good day because I'm still carrying Ethan. I thought about how my appointment would have been this morning. I imagine that I'd be feeling very empty and heavy hearted right about now. I'm so thankful that I don't feel that way at the moment. While I'm aware that the future is unknown and I could very well have those feelings at some point, I know that it would be due to reasons outside of my control. So for now I'm just extremely grateful to be living in the present, for each day that I wake up happy and feel Ethan's little fluttering movements. Those are the things that make for a good day, and today was definitely a GOOD Friday!
Love,
Ashley
Today was also a good day because I'm still carrying Ethan. I thought about how my appointment would have been this morning. I imagine that I'd be feeling very empty and heavy hearted right about now. I'm so thankful that I don't feel that way at the moment. While I'm aware that the future is unknown and I could very well have those feelings at some point, I know that it would be due to reasons outside of my control. So for now I'm just extremely grateful to be living in the present, for each day that I wake up happy and feel Ethan's little fluttering movements. Those are the things that make for a good day, and today was definitely a GOOD Friday!
Love,
Ashley
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Last Day Being Unemployed
We moved to Independence almost 6 weeks ago, and since that time I have not been working. Before we moved, I was employed as a 5th grade teacher in Little Rock. I have to admit that when I found out we were moving, there was a part of me that was a little giddy about the fact that I'd have a "break" from working. Anyone who teaches or knows a teacher knows that it is a very time-consuming (though rewarding) job. I worked many 11 hour days, and devoted at least one of my weekend days to grading, lesson planning, or general classroom projects. There were ( I'll admit numerous) times while teaching that the prospect of staying home all day sounded downright dreamy. When I moved to Little Rock, I never really got the chance to try out the whole "stay at home wife" thing because I got my job within 4 days of moving there. I knew that wasn't likely to happen as quickly this time around. Don't get me wrong, I didn't want to be at home permanently. I merely wanted a 2 week break, a vacation of sorts. I just wanted a chance to catch up on some things. To re-connect with my old friends Ellen, Oprah, Regis, Kelly, and the gals at The View. Sounds pretty good, right?
If there's one thing I've learned in these past 6 weeks it's this: Unemployment is highly overrated. As great as it's been to wake up and live my life without a schedule, it has very much grown old. There are only so many times that you can go to the mall or Target. It started to get to the point where I had to ration my errands and limit myself to one a day just so I could have something to do throughout the week! It has been depressing to realize that I could lie in bed all day doing nothing and it wouldn't matter. But of course, I don't. I am up before 7am with no plans. Plus, with everything that's been going on the last few weeks, I've had way too much time to sit around and think about things. I started to think that I might go insane if this continued.
I am happy to say that I got a job working for AAA here in Independence, and I start tomorrow. I worked at AAA in Omaha for the past 5 years during the summers and some school years. I will hold a similiar position to the one I had before, with a few more responsibilities. I am so ready to start! It will be a nice change of pace, and I'm looking forward to keeping busy.
*Side note: If I ever complain about this job for any reason, kindly direct me to this post so I can remember what it's like on the flip side. That will help me keep it all in perspective. Thanks :)
Love,
Ashley
If there's one thing I've learned in these past 6 weeks it's this: Unemployment is highly overrated. As great as it's been to wake up and live my life without a schedule, it has very much grown old. There are only so many times that you can go to the mall or Target. It started to get to the point where I had to ration my errands and limit myself to one a day just so I could have something to do throughout the week! It has been depressing to realize that I could lie in bed all day doing nothing and it wouldn't matter. But of course, I don't. I am up before 7am with no plans. Plus, with everything that's been going on the last few weeks, I've had way too much time to sit around and think about things. I started to think that I might go insane if this continued.
I am happy to say that I got a job working for AAA here in Independence, and I start tomorrow. I worked at AAA in Omaha for the past 5 years during the summers and some school years. I will hold a similiar position to the one I had before, with a few more responsibilities. I am so ready to start! It will be a nice change of pace, and I'm looking forward to keeping busy.
*Side note: If I ever complain about this job for any reason, kindly direct me to this post so I can remember what it's like on the flip side. That will help me keep it all in perspective. Thanks :)
Love,
Ashley
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